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| Report: | Given the dire circumstances of Cowbridge A's being rock bottom and facing league leaders Rhiwbina, I asked ChatGPT to provide some bullet points for a rousing pre-match speech. The best line was "who cares if they're top and we're bottom, they are only 11 men with sticks". Thankfully there were only 5 of them and they didn't have sticks!
Dan set his stall out early and refused to put the court heaters on for Ben so he could stand on the T and play old man squash. (Sorry Ben.) To be fair, Ben tried to get him back by doing a squeaky moonwalk for the whole of the 3rd game but it ended with a win for El Capitan. 1 nil Moo Toon.
Sean didn't need any heating. He just smashed the ball until it was glowing red and both players got a chance to warm their hands between serves. Mark played some tidy squash, as always but the Beast of Broadhaven has the wingspan of an albatross and cut out a lot of decent shots. 2 nil Moos.
While I was busy reffing, the Ice man chalked up his first win of the season. I didn't see any of it so I can only assume Tony must have forgotten his racket or something. I mean well done Chris! 3 nil to Chris and 3 nil to Cowbridge. What??? Qué?
The silver fox cried off last minute with the sniffles but the A's found an unbelievable sub in Dave the boast. Well, we thought we had! He was up against a sprightly Eliza who played some great squash and bagged the win, and a decent jump in squash levels too. Dave's nice like that! The biggest disappointment for Eliza was that it was sausage instead of pie for supper. Maybe next time!
Dall was reluctantly settling back into team squash despite saying he didn't want to play and now preferred to spend his time drinking cider. He had a job on his hands tonight keeping young Jacob at bay and needed to focus. By now, court 2 was beginning to resemble a giant box freezer and icicles were starting to hang from the ceiling joists. The Killer Kiwi played to the conditions and kept it simple, taking the game 3 nil and putting the icing on the frozen cake!
They might be top of the league but can they win on rainy night in Stoke? Who needs ChatGPT?
I wasn't going to bother with a report but this morning I bumped into a neighbour who was limping and needs an MRI scan. He told me he'd been out walking his dog and was taken out by a Golden retriever. You couldn't write it. (Hope you're doing well Tim - I know you still read these! X) |
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| Author: | Dan Patterson |
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| Notes: | AG2R
Entertaining match report as always! |
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