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| Report: | Tonight we entertained the students of Cardiff University, with the weight of despondency hanging heavy on the branches of despair following last week’s prematurely ghoulish defeat at the hands of Penybont.
Before embarking upon another unnecessarily verbose, aspiringly erudite diatribe, as surely befits an encounter with an institution of higher learning, a quick hat-tip must go to our friends at Abertillery for their wonderfully entertaining account of last week’s gruesome encounter. It’s a matter of debate as whether those lofty words were penned by Terry or his young scribe, Greg.
With the home outfit losing players at first and fifth string in what can only be described as a homage to the local births, deaths and marriages column, it was time to call in the cavalry. Step forward regular super-sub Stevie Cheese and Rich Kelly, newly liberated from the B team.
Up first was Jack Callum Scott, in what is likely to prove one of his final competitive outings before his forthcoming Masters encounter with Dave Haley. A poll has been conducted as to precisely how many points JCS might venture to secure from Dave. Consensus opinion has not been especially favourable, although negotiations continue over whether Dave might be persuaded to spot him a few.
None of that mattered tonight.
Jack set about his student adversary with the relentless energy of a man attempting to outrun the consequences of his own boasts. Sets one and three went deep into tie-break territory, but JCS held his nerve in both and marched off with a straight-games 3-0 victory. Whether this materially alters the Haley forecast is a matter for statisticians, bookmakers and those possessing a considerably greater tolerance for optimism than I.
Lewis Lee Fraser entertained Jack, who is surely the most tennisy non-tennis player on the south Wales squash circuit. Bamboozled by Jack’s unorthodoxy, which was not without flamboyance, Lewis lost the first game before building on a patient game plan to turns things around in sets 2 through 4.
Over on court two, Rich entertained Lloyd and looked decidedly comfortable in the opening exchanges. Lloyd, however, regrouped in the second and leveled matters, momentarily suggesting that youth might yet triumph over experience. However, representing legion middle-aged men Rich steadied the ship, reasserted himself and duly secured the W.
Meanwhile, Stevie Cheese was engaged in his own personal crusade to prove that there remains life in the Stinking Bishop. Having turned out for the B team on Tuesday and the C team last night, Cheese once again answered the call, exhibiting either admirable club loyalty or a desperate desire to avoid spending evenings at home.
Three teams in three nights ought properly to have resulted in physical collapse. Instead, Stevie wrapped matters up in straight games and immediately turned his attention to the rather more pressing business of refuelling.
Which was unfortunate.
Owing to what can only be described as a catastrophic failure in executive management, we were a serving short for the post-match feast. Some might argue this was a blessing in disguise.
With my game going my way, the home team secured a maximum points haul and those branches of despair felt a little lighter as the leaves of the first half of the season cascaded to the floor, resplendent in their fleeting Autumnal pomp.
Afterwards we learned that pallid vegan sausages are not to be trusted, and that Guinness is the drink of athletes.
A fine night's squash against a very good bunch from Cardiff Uni, played in excellent spirit.
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| Author: | S Thomas |
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| Notes: | AG1R
excellent match report - I understood most of it! |
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