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| Report: | Match report [by Tim E] aka Forrest Gump
Welcome to another exhibition of squash. Cowbridge vs Penarth. Are there any higher class teams in Welsh squash? Social class obviously.
The Bs were missing their banker tonight. His absence pushing everyone up. Did it matter. Did it bush. The bat sign was raised in the sky. Immediately answered by Luca. Like batman but more knowledge on glaciers than martial arts. Arriving in a Vauxhall Corsa courtesy car (even the bat mobile needs an MOT). Perhaps not the hero Cowbridge wanted but the hero we deserved. No nonsense. 1-0 The Bridge.
Si had called earlier to tell us he would need to leave early tonight due to personal reasons. As a club we respect confidentiality so we will just discuss the game. He dashed around like a man with a pressing issue. Every rally a real gut check. The ball splattering against the wall, shots running wild and loose. Determined not to let it slip through his fingers he refused to let go under pressure. He won but were those regulation squash shoes? The skid marks left on the... Pray for Si. 2-0
Binary Al casually dropped into conversation tonight that he'd bought a pub. I can only assume that this means that he might be transitioning to a 1 on the digital Al scale. Seems a lot but he also admitted to taking a dump in between games last week. So he could just be full of sh*t. 2-1
Kilshaw has been out for a month resting an achillies injury so a 5 setter with forest gump was exactly what he needed. Tim tried everything which included every part of his bat and hitting his opponent in the head. But Kilshaw's disguised shots were too good which is more than I can say for his shower towel which resembled a polo mint. Please, please someone buy the man a new towel.
Last but not least the top lads Ian and Chris pulled out a showstopper. If it were a cake it would have resembled a fruit cake demonstrating the unique strengths of these two players. 1: That quality only improves with age and 2: He's a complete fruit cake. You can decide who's who.
Post squash entertainment was provided by Luca whose trousers would have been the envy of Crusty the Clown himself. Sadly no juggling but I bet you he can. Cheers Old Pens. |
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| Author: | Dan Patterson |
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| Notes: | AG2R
Great match report as always! |
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